When hubby and I went to Asheville, he was super excited to tour the Biltmore estate.
Myself, less so.
It’s not that I don’t appreciate its historical significance. It’s just that I’ve seen tons of historical homes, palaces, whatnot. When you’ve seen places like Peterhof Palace and Versailles, other fancy homes aren’t quite as awe-inspiring.
But, I try to indulge him and we paid the crazy fee to get in to start the tour.
Little did I know that Biltmore is not only the largest estate in the United States, it is also known as pregnant lady hell.
1. There is no air conditioning. Which means that when it is 90 degrees plus outside, it becomes a festering inferno of stinky, grumpy people. One weird little side effect of being pregnant is that your sense of smell is off the chain, so there is no way to escape the stench of BO and cheap perfume. Plus, hot = miserable.
2. There are no bathrooms inside. And, once you start the tour (which takes at least 2 hours), the velvet ropes herd you along, preventing you from efficiently getting to the one bathroom that is outside without backtracking all the way to the start. I’ve been drinking water like a mofo during this pregnancy, so this set-up was quite anxiety provoking.
3. Stairs, stairs, and more stairs. The tour (mandated by the evil velvet ropes) only allows you to do the tour in one particular path. Now, I would think that you would do each floor up to the top, and then downstairs to exit.
I was wrong, my friends.
You go to and from the same levels several times. Why? I have no idea.
Normally, stairs are no biggie. I mean, we could all use a little exercise. But, being pregnant means that you get winded doing ANYTHING. Including one flight of stairs. Add in the real possibility of heat stroke/stench stroke (which, I’m telling you, MUST be a real thing), and each flight of stairs is like an insurmountable mountain on the way up, and a frightening opportunity to fall on the way down. It is a rollercoaster of pure pregnancy madness.
Luckily, I made it out alive, though pretty sweaty and whiny.
Now, since my husband has been quite patient with his sweaty, whiny, cranky, forgetful, pregnant wife, I made him some fluffernutter blondies! It starts with a peanut buttery blondie base, then stick ’em in the oven and broil them to get a pretty, gooey, yummy marshmallow topping!
- 1 cup salted butter, room temperature
- 1 1/2 cups light brown sugar
- 3/4 cup granulated sugar
- 1 cup chunky peanut butter
- 1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 3 eggs
- 2 2/3 cup flour
- 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
- 1/2 cup heavy cream
- Approximately 40-50 large marshmallows (or 1-2 bags mini marshmallows)
- Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Grease a 9×13 pan.
- Whisk together the flour and baking powder. Set aside.
- Cream together the butter, brown sugar, white sugar, and peanut butter. Mix in the vanilla extract. Beat in the eggs one at a time. Stir in the flour mixture until just combined. Mix in the cream. Mixture will be thick.
- Press into greased pan and bake for 40-45 minutes. Remove from oven.
- Turn on the broiler setting on oven (I used a “low” broiler setting). Cover the top of the blondies with mini marshmallows or large marshmallows cut in half (I used large because it is what I had on hand). Return to oven and watch carefully! Broil for 1-2 minutes or until marshmallows are nice and toasted.
This awesome creation may be linked up to one of these link parties.