I grew up on the “rivah.” This one to be exact:
Which meant that I was in the water at a pretty young age. But, as anyone who has swum in a river or lake knows, there is a BIG difference between pool swimming and rivah swimming.
Specifically, you are never alone. At any moment, something could brush up against your leg/arm/foot, causing sheer, unadulterated panic. And, chances are, you will NEVER know what it was. A harmless fish? Probably. A piranha? Unlikely, but you can’t rule it out. A hungry, (wo)maneating shark? You’ll never know…
Oh, and you also step on random crap the whole time, from slimy seagrass stuff to pinching crabs. Or stinging jellyfish.
But, I digress.
Luckily, I haven’t encountered any sharks in my daredevil, rivah swimming adventures. But, it looks like one got to these poor life preservers…
- 1 can refrigerated large biscuits (8 per can)
- Vegetable Oil
- 1/2 can of white frosting (NOT whipped frosting)
- Red food coloring
- Small paintbrush
- Cookie cutter with jagged edges (or a sharp knife)
- Place about 1½ to 2 inches of vegetable oil in a large skillet. Heat to approximately 325 to 350 degrees.
- While oil is warming, remove biscuits from can and peel apart. Using a small, round cutter, cut a hole in the middle of each biscuit (save the middles and fry them to make doughnut holes!).
- When oil is ready,gently place 2-3 doughnuts at a time in oil until lightly browned on each side (watch out – they cook fast!). Place on a plate lined with paper towels to drain when done.
- Put 1/2 can of white frosting in a microwavable bowl. Microwave frosting for 10-15 seconds, or until the consistency of a thick glaze. Dip doughnuts into glaze and set on paper towels to harden slightly.
- Dye leftover, melted frosting red with food coloring. Paint four red stripes into doughnuts to look like a life preserver. Let frosting harden slightly.
- Using a cookie cutter or sharp knife (I used a porcupine cutter), cut out a chunk of the doughnut so it looks like a shark bite.